28 May Smoke-free

Today, 6 years ago, God delivered me from smoking cigarettes…

I had started smoking in middle school but always said that once I got pregnant, I would quit. My first pregnancy was in 2009 with my daughter Faith. My dream was to have children. My best friend and I both got pregnant at the same time (Eve)

Before I was a stay at home mom, I worked in the restaurant industry for about 15 years. In between waiting on tables I would go out to smoke and I never hid what I was doing in front of other people so you can only imagine the comments. I absolutely hated what I was doing and the more that I tried to quit the more that I smoked. I remember that I wouldn’t even go into Publix without smoking a cigarette first because I knew that once I was inside, I wouldn’t be able to smoke.

My hearts desire was to be delivered and by this point I had already been delivered from drugs so I knew that it was possible but this one again, needed God! I was so desperate and so heartbroken. I remember I would sit at the table and look at my ultrasound pictures, just crying from my very gut.

Time came for me to go in the hospital and Give birth… The hospital knew that I had smoked and they gave me a patch to wear for the 3 days that I had to stay in the hospital. I couldn’t wait to get out and have a cigarette, especially now that I wasn’t hurting anyone but myself (so i thought). After chatting this over with one of the nurses, she had explained to me that in order for it to not transfer to the baby, that I would have to wash my hair and body once I was finished.

Faith has always been my very strong willed and determined baby! Honestly I cried every other day if not everyday, while raising her. She would scream in the car from point A to point B (even while trying to drive I would rock her car seat from the front (reaching my arm back, while driving) the whole way and listen to the screaming with times of having to pull over and get out only to put her back in and hear the screaming all over again). She wouldn’t let me ever put her down so I was always holding her, having to sleep with her on top of me and I was exhausted 24/7 with no help.

I remember my first cigarette when I was out of the hospital…. I had a towel over my head that way the smoke would not get into my hair, a robe on my body and even after I came inside I would have to wash up plus she did not like me setting her down. It just wasn’t worth it at all! It was so much work to have a cigarette. So I went from smoking 2 packs a day to wearing a patch because I thought if I could do it in the hospital for 3 days, surely I can do it now.

I wore the patch from June 1st of 2009 until July 11th of 2009. In between that time I had prayed and asked God to get me to the point where I would not even have to wear the patch at all and be totally done with this stuff!

It was a Wednesday night and I was exhaustively rocking Faith to sleep in the rocking chair and I remember looking over to my left arm (where the patch was) and she was sucking on it!! I cannot even begin to explain to you what went through my mind at that moment! I immediately removed her and stuck my tongue on the patch to see what she had tasted and my tongue went numb. I wondered if that was just in my head so I did it once again and my tongue went numb again.
That night I had made an agreement with God that if he would keep my baby safe and alive throughout the night I would never ever smoke another cigarette or pick up another patch again! Crying my eyes out, I put my sweet girl to bed. That night I took a shower and scrubbed any residue from the patch off of my body as I had felt so dirty.

I had always had a thing with God speaking to me through numbers so it was so cool to me that he delivered me on 711.
I woke up to another day with my baby girl and that was the end of smoking for me! God knew what it would take to get me to that point and he so faithfully did…. We may not always like how God answers prayers, while he is doing it but he knew the OUTCOME and the glory that would be received.

Thanking God for the many things he has done for me today… Especially this one!